| Monday, October 16, 2006 |
| My darling daughters... |
A thought just came to me that it's been a long time since u gave my daugther hugs.. ha.. wonder if any of them reads my blog.. Nevertheless i must always remember to express my love for them. God is different.. He always remember to affirm them.. Thank God for reminding me..
My dear daughters.. i must say that the length of our relationship is conted minimally by years.. Though there are times of heartaches and misunderstandings.. i never fail to thank God for you. You might feel insignificant or feel that you are just one of the many i have.. but each of you are unique and special to me.. and i know you all by name. Through you all.. i can understand how God though He has so many to care for can still say that He loves me as a unique individual..
My desire is to continue to walk through the journey of your life with you. and to see you grow up, set up family (heh.. both physical and spiritual ones).CAn't imagine the day we will come for cell with big stomachs (pregnant not fat) and even later with our children..
WE will see that come to pass... perservere in your walk with Him..We need to constantly assure our love for each other.. isn't this what ladies need? =)
loving and serving you, mummy mel. |
posted by raethelamb @ 11:31 PM  |
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| Monday, October 09, 2006 |
| pursued by Him.. |
I feel like i'm falling.. falling in love with You again! It's amazing how our relationship has so many dimensions to it.. I used to see you as a friend and Father.. and more and more i realise that you are my lover, pursuing me, courting me.
As i was reading the book, "captivating" on the part about how you pursue us with things of the nature.. to wow us, i look up at the windows of the train.. to catch the beautiful sight of the drizzle. I haven't seen one like this for such a long time and you whispered to me that this drizzle is sent by you as your expression of love to me. I used to wonder if my prince charming like some songs say will fetch me the stars in the sky, etc.. and true enough.. you did it.
When the train went through the tunnel, i saw my reflection in the window facing me.. and He said, " Look at yourself, aren't u beautiful? That's how i feel about you and see you." It was that instance that i felt the prettiest, to be able to hear my lover say that.
Just a few days before... i saw this bird rushing across the road.. in a panicky manner.. it was such a cute sight.. and i just smile to myself.. and i heard Him say again, " You are finally smiling, it's been long since i saw the smile on ur face." I felt so touched that He was using means and ways to bring that smile on my face.. my lover..
He is really such a romantic God.. He brought to my mind, how in the past, when i was shaken by some stuff . i asked Him to show me a reason for being happy.. and the next moment, when i looked down at the road while waiting to cross it, i saw inscribed on it, "Jesus loves you".. each time till this day whenever i pass by that road.. i will steal a look at His love message to me and this never fails to cheer me up...However this r/s with him developed further into that with a lover.. when i was in Indonesia.. the Lord actually showed me through words written on a fence, "Melissa cantik sekali" (Melissa is very pretty). heh.. i guess He is the only one who will tell me that i am beautiful so many times... and Pastor actually said that it was the Lord's affirmation to me.
Dear lover, you are so sweet to me.. the ways you speak to me.. so unique and special.. maybe cos u know my love language is words of affirmation? I love you too and you are the most handsome guy in my life. *muacks* |
| posted by raethelamb @ 11:35 PM |
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| the ring... |
Found the ring.. which speaks of a history.. It was a ring that I got together with ZY. However during one of the G12 conference, Pastor Caesar asked us to sacrifice something , symbolic and significant to us. I threw my ring in.. the team then bought me one more for my birthday.. and coincidentally, during one of the camp, Pastor William challenged us to sacrifice sth that matters to us and once again I put my ring into the bag. However, this time round, Ps William returned the ring to me and said that he felt that the Lord wants me to have it back.. if I am not wrong, this is the camp which ps belchin prophesied over me.
The ring is engraved the verse, “Proverbs 31:29”- many women do noble things, but u surpass them all. Over the years, I have forgotten about the ring and it has turned dirty and black. Lately, I bought the silver solution and when I chanced upon the ring, I gave it a good clean. It’s now good as new.. shining again…
At the Gb retreat, the theme was Arise and shine, from the EJ 288 meeting, one of the points was also from salt to light. CP prayed for me that I will be light to draw pple to me.. somehow.. everything seems to fit into a pic.. The lord seems to be telling me to arise and shine again.. like the ring.. and take up the ambitions to be the surpasser.. to have dreams I used to have and the faith that move mountains.. no longer looking back but forward.. Recently… I feel that I have lost the confidence to lead.. I will arise.
Today, the service speaks about Prayer.. to pray for open doors and to b the pastor of the place we are in.. somehow.. I know He is speaking to me again.. I was just hesitant about the Nie prayer and asking if the time cld be shifted earlier.. cos I end at 1030 and it was a 7 hour wait. And evenings are precious to me.. but upon hearing the word.. I know I have to not build my house, Haggai 1 (as in being just concerned about having my evenings for my hobby-hairdressing) but I got to build His house…
3 reasons why people don’t pray:
1) sacrifice. It is a sacrifice of time and convenience. And most of the time we are too focused building our house
2) self reliance. It feels uneasy to be praying and not doing things ‘cos we are often so used to relying on our own strength to resolve issues instead of turning to God in prayer. Yet this is what the Lord wants.. that we depend on His strength.
3) self glorification. WE usually do things that bring glory to ourselves and prayer is something that is done in the secret such that when sth happen all glory goes to Him ‘cos it is really not about what we do but His hand moving.
Matthew6:5-9
During the EJ 288 mtg.. the lord also challenged me to pray and pray.
I need to pray.. and I have found my reason to be part of the NIE prayer group.. and I felt prompted to take up responsibilities.. for now.. will volunteer to be the secretary tho’ I don’t really know the role.
The real test of how committed we are to His commission is not when we are leaders.. cos most of the sheep are not in church but out of church.. it’s when we do not have a group that we have compassion for the people around us.. this is truly not doing out of a duty but a call.
Mel.. rise up…
LH is gonna move into auntie’s home.. the one whom I tried to reach out to and opened up to share with me.. somehow, it feels divine.. that my neighbours will be saved..
So now my focus is : NIE/ DOVER. |
| posted by raethelamb @ 11:16 PM |
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Name: raethelamb
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